This is the day when I stop acting and start thinking. It’s probably driven by the mistakes I’ve made, but I don’t feel sorrow towards them, it’s just the way things happened.
“the shallowness inside me is going beyond all your beauty,
but you don’t seem to glimpse any of this.
And I look you in the eye while your lips stretch side to side
forming the most beautiful smile ever seen
when a draining contortion in my soul starts to flow.
Every time you laugh I die.”
What if the rest of the world succumbs in an immense pain and depression leading undoubtedly to the most horrible and unpredictable death ? Nothing I guess. Wait, stop, I just said the rest of the world, that’s a huge amount of people... Yes, but again, nothing I guess. It seems there’s something or someone in this mind and maybe... unattainable.
“All the things that are sad
Are saved deep in my heart
And all I gave was more
Than all I ever asked for.
Always see myself
As the one that loved.”
As a child, like everyone else, I dreamed, and I dreamed a lot, about life, about people, about mom, about me. As a man, life is what it is, I’ve been contemplating earth for years, I’ve been seeing life and how we interact with it, I’ve been feeling it, I’ve been meeting people and I’ve been knowing me. After several years I’m able to say everything ‘s become steady. I lack of different emotions, there’s no twist of feelings and old days born anew.
Old days, I recall them, feeling my feelings for the first times, starting the trip of knowing and interpreting the place I am. I’m starting to think I’ve learnt more in those few years than in the rest of my life. Have I reached my adulthood too quickly? Is there anything I can do from here to feel refreshed and new again? Is it something or anything? I remember my mother telling me to find that very special girl, telling me to love her madly so we can be as one. Is it what we are supposed to do? I try and I try to reach those feelings, the joy and the happiness, the beginning and the end in just one moment... Is love the answer?
“This whole new view changed my sight
The bird has lost it’s wings again
For once foreseeing the end from here
From this perspective I see myself numbing
Hopeful mind and lonesome heart
Could never be seen as one”
You are my friend and I love you.
You are different and I love you.
You are my mother and I love you.
You are my enemy and I love you.
You are the love of my life, and yes, I love you.
“there’s nothing else from here, this is it”.